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Old 01-22-2011, 03:57 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New England USA
Posts: 1,231
Default Confusion

Hey RP,

I suspect you're going to know what I have to say about this before I say it. But for others that are maybe new or haven't heard this maybe it will be useful.

I'm always appalled but the apparent lack of knowledge of these waters by 'supposed' professionals or other knowledgeable people. And I think that's why 'jealousy' is such a difficult mountain to climb for most people. They are picking the wrong path based on advice of these people who are often on the wrong one themself !

1> Jealousy and envy are two very different things and have to be addressed differently and with different tools.

2> Jealousy is a FEAR based protective response. We are FEARFUL of LOSING something we value (usually highly).

3> Envy results from feelings of inadequacy and insecurity. We think life is a competition, relationships are a competition and that we don't have what we need to compete successfully.

Fear of loss can only come from something we feel we've WON ! Something we have some 'ownership' claims to. Living, sentinent creatures are not designed to be 'owned' !

Nobody can 'steal' anyone's heart, respect, love unless we behave in some manner as to become unrespected, - 'unloveable'. If this emotion can be removed so easily it was never there in the first place. Only a masquerade.

The feelings of fear and insecurity can be a catalyst though. As we witness so often on this forum and other similar places and in person, being forced (it seems that's what it often takes) to sit back, get some clarity on what's at the root of these emotions and belief systems, separate accordingly (jealousy vs envy), and attack the problem(s) using the proper tools and approach can be a life changing and life GIVING experience.

Once we have the proper understanding and develop some skills, life is never the same for us. It's often like the wind finally under our wings. A feeling of freedom and confidence that we always wished for before but understood at some deeper level we didn't have. Release of fear !

So I think this article adds more confusion to the mix rather than clarity.
Although some of the methods might be used in certain situations, overall it misses the big picture.

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