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Old 01-21-2011, 01:20 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

Was it a rule or a boundary. I am no good with rules, which is why we don't have them; rules are meant to be broken in my mind... boundaries are fluid and negotiable.

I have broken boundaries and so have my loves... it is sometimes a good thing so as to know that they really are boundaries and know that you can come back from them. Also to know how important the boundary is for a person. This is an unfortunate realization the first few times around, but it gets easier to cope as you go along. It isn't easy for anyone concerned a lot of the time...

SO! that being said... I don't suggest that you go ahead and push push push... that isn't fair and of course she won't trust you. But you have every right to make a mistake by falingl into a situation where you didn't know there was a boundary there, didn't understand the boundary entirely or just forgot... there are often a LOT of boundaries to remember as you start out.

I think a bit of forgiveness on this could be asked for at some point. Dwelling on anger and lack of trust is a little selfish at some point. It might be time she came back from that and everyone chalk it up to lesson learned... next time you will know how she will react, will do your best to pay more attention and act with more integrity because you will keep your word... she needs to let you show that you are trustworthy. You can't do that if she doesn't give you another chance. Integrity is built and not just a given.
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