Sorry for your troubles. Welcome to the forum.
Like vodkafan, I also believe there are plenty of benefits to polyamory, enough to have agreed to make the transition from traditional monogamy. BUT it certainly is not for everyone. Not by a long shot. The only person who can decide for you is YOU.
Not knowing any more about your situation, I can only offer some generalizations that I have found to be true. So, in no particular order:
- When a person's actions do not agree with his/her words, trust what s/he DOES. Words can be just so much hot air; actions reveal the heart.
- Polyamory is a lot of hard work for everyone involved.
- If a polyamorous situation is not working for everyone concerned, IT'S NOT WORKING and needs to be fixed.
Good luck to you, however your situation works out.