It sounds like he is doing poly a different way to you... it sounds like he is the type that believes their poly to be about freedom and no attachment to others. That is fine, but if you are looking for the attachment and respect that comes with commitment then it could be that you are not suited. His poly might not be your poly. That is fine, but can be really difficult. It's not impossible though if you start negotiating and seeing if your compromises can be changed into some comfortable boundaries... first off it sounds like you need more communication and openness from him.
I suggest that you look at the sticky on communication and look at the threads on lessons learned and foundations... tagged "lessons" and "foundations" perhaps they will help.
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