As for your wife's family, Flakey, I wouldn't necessarily be too terribly concerned. I have learned not to underestimate people's ability to overlook things that don't fit into their worldview. One example: I live next door to my straight-laced, conservative, religious mother and grandmother. My Hubby is an Edenist, which among other things means he tends to be nude at home unless it is too cold or there are children present. Mother didn't bat an eye when she found out. Grandma was amused and curious! And it didn't change our relationship at all, except that they ALWAYS call before they come over. Which of course is all to the good.
So unless your in-laws actually catch one of you coming out of the bedroom with a new partner, you can probably work out a solution to the "family" issue.