Originally Posted by SNeacail
I don't see that taking someone as a lover negates the ability to build a friendship. However, I would never assume they are a good fit for the family until a friendship has been built. I may be in the minority, but until a friendship has been formed, they shouldn't even be introduced to the family (ie. children) at all. In fact the introductions should start with the other adult family memebers and the decission of when it's time to make further introductions should be a mutal decission.
I don't think it negates the possibility that they could be friends. I know they could-I'm friends with all of my.... ex-playmates.
But-they aren't ever going to be "family"..
I do happen to agree with you (as well you know I'm sure by now)...
that "newbies" should not be brought into the circle with my children until they are established friends.
There's got to be a safety net for my kiddos.
Anyway-it is VERY interesting hearing all of the different ideas!
For me, the past being what it is, if someone is going to be considered as a long term partner
I have to agree with MG, if there isn't attraction-the friendship won't go any further.
But I can be attracted, VERY VERY attracted and not take it past friendship.