Originally Posted by XYZ123
Not to attack on your first post, but you're standing on a landmine my friend. As far as I'm concerned. Was this woman ACTUALLY bipolar or are you just labeling her as such? Because...I'm about as bipolar as you can get and I am quite capable of monitoring myself and maintaining healthy relationships. I hate when people say "s/he's being bipolar" when they're not. Because it stigmatizes people like me who put ALOT of effort into controlling the disease.
Do you think I'd want you to have issues with your wife? No.
I've spent 1.5-2 years on a spiritual path.. lots of meditation, guidance, and have a crazy strong intuition now.
I am not labeling your wife anything. I could detail out my 7 years with this woman... and share with you what I learned. But my short reading...
(Suicidal, Always insecure, No friends, Lack of Deservedness, Were UNAWARE of herself (U seem to be aware / self monitoring), ...Insecure.. Very negative connotations / jumping to conclusions.. If someting happened X.. She'd take out interpretation in a very negative way about those people.. and then flip flop on her opinions about them.. I realized she used to do the same with me... to others.. Complain about one to the other.. Funky think... I NEVER told anyone anything bad about her.. I accepted her issues as something I'll love & help her grow out of..)
Any person who is in constant fear of you finding someone else or are you having an affair with someone else... suffers from major insecurity.. & deservedness issues..
Probably because of some previous / childhood experience...
All the things you outlined about her.. every small item.. its like a copy of my ex.
Its weird that I should even read & comment on your post. But its like what you are doing is a copy of me.. and what she is doing & saying is a copy of her.
I kept trying with open love.. Funny that I used the same line..
"love & let go" ... Let someone be free...
I paid for my stupidity and my unconditional, unwavering love, trust & faith..
I should've seen the signs.
Someone cannot love or be happy with another unless they are happy being alone.. being themselves ...self love.
I was too loving & trusting & open minded. She was insecure, and lacked sense of deservedness and socially conditioned for 'nice' girl but instinctively driven to a guy / guys for validation. Always afraid I'd leave her for someone else.. always asking me if i've found a new girl friend. I never did .. but she would throw herself on any male who gave her attention.
As long as you keep being the one GIVING HER ATTENTION... I think you're safe.
BUT if you really want to help her.. She has to BE WANT TO BE HELPED & HEALED out of her INSECURITY & LACK OF DESERVEDNESS. (If at all..)
I worked on her a lot.. to help.. but those that do not want to HEAL or be HELPED.. Cannot be.. Hope you have better luck.
PS: You can totally ignore what I have said.. Sorry if I may have hurt you in any way.. I went through a ton of lies & hurt.. I'm clean of it now.. and can see the whole thing in a clear light.