Originally Posted by sage
This term of yours "mono by default" I find jarring. I know "default" has two meanings but you seem to be using it negatively. Maybe it's just me but it makes me feel like you're settling for mono because you have no other choice?
I know I'm probably projecting my own stuff onto your situation. I'm on a bit of a crusade to be a "positive mono" because I tired of people feeling sorry for me. That's obviously why it triggers me.
I can understand that, and the tone of my post does lend itself to your assessment.
But mono by default is something I use to simply state that I am poly or trying to be but not yet. I am definitely a positive mono, I can definitively say that and I am sorry it was portrayed any differently, that was my error and not the case. I am of course not fishing for pity but in a very real sense I am monogamous to TP because I have not found another partner...