I'm not worried about emotions clouding decisions, I just really don't know how to deal with it, or what to do. I can tell her "it's fine. Don't worry about it. Go ahead." I did that for about 2 months, trying my damndest to get over it fast. But really, I just end up depressed, and the thoughts that make me feel better about it are when I have time with her, and the next time I can drink. Which sounds worse than it is, since I've had any alcohol at all twice in the last 3 weeks or so.
Ideally, she dates him, and I stop feeling depressed to the point that I want my brain to just shut down and leave me alone. Failing that, I'd like to know how to deal with things going forward, because now I feel terrible about this, since she dealt with my relationship with a woman, even though it upset the hell out of her.
Really, I'm absolutely at a loss, and don't know how to deal with the jealousy. Women have never made me jealous like this. It just doesn't strike me as the same role, I guess. It makes me angry, nauseous, hurt, depressed, and generally not good.