Thanks for the affirmation, eklctc.
I'm feeling pretty positive about things right now.
About two weeks ago I started up a new sexual-friendship (not a relationship, at least not at this point, but some really fun playing around) with a guy named Harry. We've seen each other a few times since then already, and it's done wonders for keeping me from obsessing over the state of things with Gia and Eric. I'm all for introspection and processing, but it really doesn't do any good to dwell on stuff *unendingly*, and I feel like that's what I had started to do.
I've also found that just having talked to Gia about my feelings for Eric has really made it easier to be around the two of them together. It's like some mental pressure was released... my feelings for Eric no longer feels like something problematic or taboo to me.
So between those two things -- having talked to Gia and my new romps with Harry -- I find that I'm much more content to not worry about Eric and if/when/how I'm going to bring up my feelings. It's just not that big a deal. I'll find the right time to tell him sometime in the spring (he has seasonal affective disorder, so his ability to cope with emotional stuff is just not that good in the winter).
As of the last few months, Gia and I see each other about once a week socially and have "just us" time about twice a month. When I see other people post on here about spending a couple days a week with their non-primary partners, it makes it feel like I hardly spend any time with my lady in comparison. But that's just the way it's gotta be... both of us have *very* active and busy lives, and her energy is especially limited right now.
I wonder if my situation, in terms of time spent together, is atypical for secondaries who live in the same town as their partner?