This New Year, Derby hosted a large and very fun party
There was a couple there who have sort of been at the center of why I started questioning myself in the area of judgement concerning swinging and swingers.
I have met the woman before and she is a budding friend of Redpepper's. I am so suspicious of people's intentions sometimes that I can be blinded to the individuals who are involved. The unknown is not my favorite thing and I like to "take it to the fight" if I absolutely have to.... so to speak.
So, as soon as I entered the party I made a bee line directly to this woman and her husband. I engaged him in conversation as we both have very similar military experiences and found out he grew up very close to where I did.
Throughout the night I got his wife up to dance and encouraged Redpepper to get her husband on the dance floor.
I got to lift the shroud of ignorance I had about this friendly and pleasant couple. I understand why Redpepper enjoys their friendship. Now she can enjoy this new friend's company even more and I can relax my watchdog mentality. It'll come up again I am sure as we take on new adventures and other invitations come her way. But at least I made it through this one and I learned a few things.
Yes I still have the judgmental belief that any large social atmosphere hosted by swingers will inevitably have that energy and I don't want to be around it, but I am pushing myself to see people as individuals and not identifying them by what they do as a group.