My husband and I found a wonderful counselor and I'm not sure we could have gotten through some of the roughest times without her. She has really helped us nail down some of our issues, and help keep us real with our new poly arrangement.
I try very hard not to judge a cheater, since I've been there. A lot of pain came from my actions, but a lot of GOOD came, too.
I am a good person but I have hurt people along the way. One thing I am grateful for is the forgiveness and understanding my husband has never failed to give. I do not deserve him! But who among us is deserving of mercy, anyway?