Originally Posted by NeonKaos
Oh yeah, and you both need to focus on your children, especially the new baby; not go looking for people to date.
I agree with what Neon said, especially this! I'm so saddened you both got married and yet had such problems right away. Maybe even tho you personally found the wedding meaningful, something about the commitment after 11 years of just living together freaked him out. Did you two vow to be monogamous, or was there some other kind of expectation?
ETA, I see you are in France. Are either of you French? I know traditionally French culture allows for a spouse and a lover, sort of dont ask dont tell type things, or sometime acknowledged. Does this enter into it at all, I wonder?
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw
me: Mags, female, pansexual, poly, 59, loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, poly, 37