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Old 01-06-2011, 09:27 PM
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FlameKat FlameKat is offline
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Originally Posted by Olderwoman View Post
This is your personal conclusion, which is an opinion not a fact.

What one person is offended by may not offend another person. To make the conclusion that the source (me or the statement) is at fault is placing blame on the source (me or my actions) for your personal reactions. I.E. " were being offensive.."

Yes Exactly. I agree. Therefore, I did not apologize for "being offensive."

To say, "I'm sorry for "being offensive." is to agree that I was being offensive. (And I don't agree or accept the perception that I was.)

But to say, "I am sorry you were offended by what I said." is to express a feeling of empathy or compassion. but it does not own the perception that I was being offensive.

Perhaps there are members who don't think I was being offensive. Perhaps others agree that I was. These are perceptions and opinions.

True, but several posters implied that an apology was a good idea. That is what started my contemplation on different kinds of apologies. I have actually learned a lot; and hopefully it will help me to change my careless ways and become a better person.

Actually I refused to believe that you or they were truly offended. And if they were, I could not understand why they were.
People don't "refuse to understand" they either understand or they don't understand.

Yes I did. I seriously thought it was sarcasm, so I didn't take it seriously. (I think people are sometimes way too serious and sensitive about everything. Life is too short for so much drama in my opinion.)

Yes, but that is just my impression. Now I do regret posting anything to you in the first place. You admit above that you were seeking other people's "personal opinions or experiences" and then you chose to find mine "offensive." If I had known you were going to be so easily offended I would not have said anything at all. I have no way of knowing what might offend anyone. I was just being myself, relaxed and and honest and I was found to be "offensive." My reaction is if you are going to seek other people's "personal opinions or experiences" and you want honesty, you might try not to be so quick to be offended.

Look for the meaning behind my words. Do you really think I was purposely trying to offend you? Why would I do that?

If I did not care I would not have started this thread.

You told me you found it "offensive" because you did not want to "be understood just "because you were a woman" and that you want to be understood "because you are human."

( Personally I will take any kind of understanding I can get. )

I know a lot of people would like to think that masculine and feminine traits are equal and the same, but they are not. Perhaps humans will some day evolve to the point where all are both male and female physically and mentally, but we aren't there yet. Until then, we are divided and we can see differences between the masculine and the feminine traits regardless of the physical body.

I was speaking from my personal experience which has observed that the feminine side tends to be more sensitive to emotions and have more of a need to be understood. From my experience men (masculine) are less prone to want to talk about their feelings. Of course that is my experience and opinion which is what you wanted and it is a generalization, so what? I have seen a lot of people making generalizations on this forum.

I have heard we all have a masculine side and a feminine side. (And maybe more sides that we are aware of.) My feminine side desires to be perfectly understood, even though I know now that this is unlikely to happen. My masculine side really doesn't care that much. That's my personal experience.
I asked for personal opinion and expereiences on what price is too high to pay to keep their personal integrity - not their personal opinions of wheter or not they felt i may lie, be deceitful or other be delicat or fragile etc and so forth - you do not know me therefore can have no personal opinion or experience of me (other than this extremely long running misunderstanding)
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