Originally Posted by monolicious
But I often feel like I'm riding a rare fence- living a mono life with a poly partner. .
I admittedly spent a lot of time hovering between the two communities. I have never felt actually really connected to any social group though, so effectively feeling like a community of one is not uncomfortable to me. I enjoy our poly community a lot now and have found a place within it. I can be completely open with Redpepper amongst those friends. I do not have that freedom with most of my mono friends.
I understand the advice that poly people should avoid mono people for intimate relationships just as I usually discourage monos from dating polyamorous people. It makes sense to share your love with someone who truly understands "how you love" and communicates love the same way you do; monos often with exclusivity and pollies often with openness and expansiveness. Monos often feel inadequate and somewhat loved less I think and poly people often feel suppressed and manipulated. BUT sometimes it really works and through intense work, communication and respect a deeper level of love and connection can be reached and it is healthy and wonderful