I'm going to take the other train on this one...
It's not that I disagree with any previous posters. I don't.
I was the cheater. I was in love with both Maca (my husband) and GG (my current boyfriend).
It doesn't matter what the details were for why I cheated on Maca with GG. I did.
The rest is history so to speak.
But-the whole reason that I am here today sitting side by side with Maca is because he accepted that telling me to give up the other love of my life on account of the fact that I found polyamory through some HIGHLY FUCKED UP BEHAVIORS wasn't realistic or reasonable if he loved me.
My behaviors were devastating for Maca (and myself and GG as well as our children).
There is NO DOUBT that I was wrong.
I accepted some insanely difficult boundaries for the right to have GG as my boyfriend. Because Maca did have a right to distrust, hurt feelings etc.
But the fact remains that if either of them were to tell me that unless I gave up the other they would leave-that person would have to leave because I love them both.
ONLY YOU know what will or won't work for you.
Feel free to read my blog or my previous posts for our story.
"Love As Thou Wilt"