I really am trying to be as reasonable as possible, because I know it's difficult. But, admittedly I am feeling as though I'm being asked to give her "equal status" without earning it.
This resonates with me. You're being asked to waive certain boundaries/rules that were set in place for a reason - and for someone who has been in HIS life for less than a month.
That would/did/does bother me.
They are in the dating stage - they should be (imho) dating - as in not coming IN, going OUT.
But those are my feelings. I just hope you're not being more than fair and end up compromising yourself or hurting yourself in the process.