I am chronically ill. We adopted, however not due to my illness. To much crud in the gene pool, on his side. I will be honest and say that I wish I did have a pregnancy. However, that being said I can honesty say and have said
I AM SO GLAD WE DIDN"T GET PREGNANT! just wanted to shout it.
I can not image our life with out this particular human being in it. My child is a different color from me, and that matters not. What matters is that my child knows who her Momma and Daddy are. My child knows how loved and wanted and cared for she is. My child knows I would pick her over any one else in the whole entire world. Maybe, not a popular sentiment on a relationship board but true.
My illness does have an effect on her, however not because she feels responsible. It effects how balls to the wall we can be, in playing.
I can honestly say there has never ever been a regretful moment since we adopted her. I know the exact moment I realized my baby knew I was her Mama. Duh! she knew before I did. We got her at 1 day old. When we came home and I handed my perfectly happy newborn to my neighbor and she started screaming and I took her back, imediate happy baby. I knew, she knew she was my baby. One of the best days of my entire life.
I think only you will know what is right for you and Karma. I do know you can nurse an adopted baby. Our's happened so fast we couldn't do that.
She came a month early.