I posted on another thread so I decided to come over here from behind the lurking cloak to introduce myself and dismiss any notion that I may be a troll!!
I am MWM married to a wonderful woman for 15 years. I wandered down the infidelity path more than two years ago and was discovered by my wife in June 2009. Since then, we have been working on our marital issues mostly through conselling and copious amounts of reading and talking....and talking. What we have been discovering is that I don't want to leave my marriage, that my wife still loves me very much and that I am happy with what is has given us and that it is not worth leaving, especially for the sake of our two daughters, but...............there is something more that I would like to explore within the security and comfort of our marriage.
We made a breakthrough in early October of this year with the help of our consellor. What we discovered is that polyamory might be a lifestyle that will work for us. Our consellor seems to be open-marriage and alternative lifestyle savvy and has given us some direction, much to our surprise (well, mostly mine, as I thought he would completely shut me down when I first mentioned it to him in therapy). We had discussed opening up our marriage a year before and had broached the subject a couple more times with it always ending up that it wasn't right for my wife, or that it wasn't the right thing to do.
Now, we are progressing and taking in some of the material on this site. What is particularily interesting is the testimonials from the monogamous partner's point of view. This has helped my wife address and ask the right questions, not only of me, but of herself.
Love is not a finite resource.
Thanks for allowing me to 'come out' on this site!!!!