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Old 12-29-2010, 11:24 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
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Originally Posted by Mohegan View Post
I have a lot of things that will make pregnancy very hard on me. Fibromyalgia and my bad back being top on the list. Add in a history of cervical cancer, endometriosis plus all my mental stuff (OCD, depression, anxiety) I'm gonna have a hard pregnancy . . . There is so much I could risk my child inheriting from either of us . . .
Think past the pregnancy and what raising a child will be like for you, with OCD, depression, anxiety, and various physical ailments. Not only would it be tough on you but very tough on the kid. I was raised by an extremely depressed and paranoid mother, who suffered from anxiety and had physical problems, too, and my life was pretty fucked up for a long time because of it. I wouldn't wish that kind of burden on any child -- my life revolved around making my mother feel better, always thinking it was my fault when she was unhappy or in pain. It didn't matter that she told me it wasn't my fault, kids think they are the cause of stuff. And then I acted out because there was nothing I could do, and I didn't treat myself very well. I'm 50 now and still have so many unresolved issues over my upbringing. Sometimes we have to accept that being a parent might not be the best role for us. Do you really think you can focus your attention and life on raising another human being to be an emotionally well and happy individual who contributes to society? And not just to satisfy some urge in you? You can't be scattered and flip-flopping back and forth about everything, you have to provide stability and discipline to parent well.
Originally Posted by Mohegan View Post
But I've always wanted to experience pregnancy and carrying a child.
You make it sound like the challenge of running a marathon. It's another person's life you're talking about. Sorry to be so blunt, but I find the idea troublesome when someone has so much going on, wants to bring a kid into the world, and thinks only of the pregnancy and not beyond that.
The world opens up... when you do.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein

Last edited by nycindie; 12-29-2010 at 11:34 PM.
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