I understand...and I think that even though you have responded to me, Karma will read it and get a better understanding of the "why" behind your request. ?I also think that your RL friends on here, will see it and more fully understand why you live the way you do, and why you may treat them or others a certain way.
So, overall, I think it is a good thing. You should still vent, and express WHY you feel the way you do. And the little things, such as the appology to Panda above) will help to make things better. Overall, if they are HONESTLY your friend, they will not chastize you for your feelings, but may actually understand, and be able to help you through them. I'm sending you some good energy. I wish I could give you a hug in person just to make you feel better. The best I can do is this: ((((((HUGS))))))
I hope your Christmas goes better, and you feel better.
There is a lid for every pot...Sometimes even two or three...