Originally Posted by Rachelina
It is possible to transition from cheating to poly. My husband and I have done so (he was the one who cheated). I don't know how long you've been with T, but every single day that you continue lying to N is going to make it more painful to him when you finally do tell him. So tell him, and do whatever is necessary to rebuild trust and heal the relationship. Do whatever you can to make him feel loved. With us it's taken months of talking, and a lot of crying, but I feel like we are stronger than we were before. It will be difficult, but so are most things worth doing.
100% agree. Brutal honesty is the way to go. Lies don't do anyone any favors.