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Old 12-18-2010, 11:15 AM
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DrunkenPorcupine DrunkenPorcupine is offline
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Quote:
I am also struggling with the idea of accepting that I am poly.
You're not poly. Poly is specifically "consentual non-monogamy". What you're describing is cheating.

Quote:
Why can something that is wrong make me feel so happy?
The short version? Because in everything you mentioned you ignored "How N feels". You mentioned fear of yourself going against societal norms, your feelings to T and N, et cetera.

But not how N would react. Not the pain you will cause him by cheating.

Therein lies your answer. It can feel good because you're not giving regard to how N will be crushed. You might be aware it will happen, but your sense of empathy towards it hasn't kicked in.
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