I am learning to keep myself out of things that don't involve me.
I am frustrated and irritated.
P has been texting me, keeping in touch, and I'm ok with that. Even with the texts having a tone of being primarily to keep a line of contact with him.
I *thought* we were on our way to being friends before, during and even after.
She texts me and asks me how *I* feel about her contacting him. I'm like, well, I'm somewhat apprehensive, fairly scared about the feelings between the two of you flaring up and taking over a friendship. And he needs more time. So not right now.
I had shared every single text with W. Asked him what he thought. How he felt. He said "I need more time"
I was hesitant to tell her that - because the theme of the issues when they were together was that I was irrational, unreasonable and controlling. So... I figured that if it came from me... that's the thought process that would happen again.
So my text about he needs more time and I am uncomfortable was read as "Jane has made it abundantly clear that she doesn't want us to be in contact"
And now I'm irritated.
Not because she chose to read it wrong - but because she chose to text him anyhow, and it upset him.
But its none of my business. Their relationship (or non-relationship) is none of my business. And I have finally (with the help of a really awesome lady) figured that out.
The only thing that's my business is how it affects me or my children. And it doesn't.
W will make his decisions about when/where/how he'd like to communicate with her again... and if she wants to be friends with me, I'm still open to that. But I'm taking back my stress levels... this is not my buisness.
I wish I'd learned that sooner.