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Old 12-14-2010, 11:04 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangerinKS View Post
my wife . . . thinks the breakup was right, although she has also said that she won't veto anything if I really want it...though I would have a hard time going through with it if I felt she didn't really approve. I have not told my lover this. I have been trying to give her space.
Your wife is probably just reacting to seeing you hurting. Of course she cares about you, but she might be jumping a little too hard on the break-up bandwagon, I don't know. If there is something there with this woman and you are both still missing each other, it seems to me you can still work it out. And if your wife saw that, I think she would be supportive of that, unless she's disapproving of the woman herself or not really wanting you to have another relationship. But don't just wonder about whether or not it could work with this woman again, express to her that you want it to and will strive for it to work. Why not ask her to give you another chance.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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