After thinking about it the last few days, I have to agree with both of you. The breakup was premature on my part...this could have been fixed, or at least I needed to give it more time. This was the first poly experience for either one of us, and the mistakes are clear.
I miss her terribly, and from her brief messages it appears she feels the same way but she says she still needs time to think. But she also said she doesn't want to cause me further pain. I just don't know if this can be rebuilt.
I really don't know what to do. I am working on my insecurities, which is all I can do now. But I can't get her out of my head, I still feel totally in love with her, and I miss her so damn much.