Thanks so much for the advice everyone. I wish we could go to counseling but right now we just don't have the money. I am trying to nurture each relationship separately and try to move forward through the problems so that all 3 of us can be good together. I am just not sure what my next move should be. I have been reading a lot on this forum and on others and I am realizing that rushing things is nearly guaranteed to result in disaster. I am just so eager to get through the problems and move on to better days with the men I love.
I look forward to getting more advice and of course any stories on how others have made similar situations work would be very helpful.