I've had a similar experience to Magdyln.
I spent a good two years searching for a man that was as decent as my husband. Mono was a rarity. A HUGE RARITY!
I dated upwards of 50 men in a couple of years, some of which I shared WAY too much with for what they were worth and that is my one regret. I needed to be loved, cherished and appreciated treated with respect and instead I was used. I gave them a piece of me that they did not deserve and it pains me that women do this more often than not. I respected them and was willing to cherish and love them.... it disgusts me now to think of it.
It was Mono that changed me. He pointed out that my body is a temple and should be honoured and respected, that I should be honoured and respected. He has set the bar so high that I doubt there are as many men with as much quality as he... in return he has made what I give quality also. It has been a real gift. One of the biggest of my life.
It's really quite simple, be respectful, don't be selfish and really pay attention with your whole heart.... I don't know why more people don't get it. To me, having really thought about what I expect and what I can give I find that I just really don't have time or tolerance for most people because I expect a certain level of quality in our interaction... I hope that doesn't leave me lonely one day, because it's very hard to find.
I think that really, men have been treated badly, so then treat others badly and quality is lost. Women expect that men are going to give them a half ass amount of attention and love and they give a half ass amount back because of that expectation. No one wins...
There seems to be a real lack of investment and vulnerability that people in general give because they are fearful, and they have every reason to be. With some dating sites, daters and the attitude that cheating and casual/non invested sex is the best option, the quick fix, the temporary high, there is little reason to pay attention (this being said after plenty of discussion about how casual sex can be fun and nurturing... just so you know that I know the difference). It's almost become better to be numb, apathetic and lazy when it comes to interactions with others. Either that or just don't have interactions.... .
sad, very sad.
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