Idealist Poly Blog Part 35- Christian Judgement
Last week, I received an e-mail from a former acquaintance. At one time, we had been fairly close but she had moved away. I ran into her one night at a club and we were both glad to see each other. She began to share about her life since we’ve seen each other last and asked me questions about my life. A few days later, I received an e-mail from her telling me that she is a Christian (which I knew already) and that although she isn’t judging me, nevertheless, I am sinning and need to turn my life over to the Lord.
I live in the Deep South and this was the last straw for me when it comes to being honest about my lifestyle. Apparently it is best to avoid the whole process of explaining polyamory. For the most part, people don’t get it. I have tried to explain it and my closest friends have accepted my lifestyle choice, but to say that they understand it would be going a bit too far.
After living a polyamorous lifestyle for almost a year now, Richard and I both feel that polyamory is right for us individually and as a couple.
Richard is working 7 days a week and the job site is 2 hours away, so that gives us a limited amount of time together. We manage somehow to be together as much as possible- especially when he can get a day or two off. He has reconnected with Cheri and I am glad because she lives in the area where he is working so she will occasionally spend a few days with him over there which helps to keep him company!!
On Halloween night, we went to a party and met a lot of new people!! Richard met Sherrie that night. They have managed to go out 3 times since then and that is going good. She doesn’t seem to be possessive or demanding.
So, right now, Richard has me, Cheri and Sherrie and that is working out well for him and I’m very comfortable with it. I have never met Cheri, but of course I was with Rickard when he met Sheri. When we had a moment alone, she asked me about Richard. I reassured her that he is a thoughtful and considerate guy. She asked “what is he looking for” and the simple answer that I felt was the best way to go was “friends with benefits”. They had sex on the first date, which sort of surprised me, but apparently it’s been a while since she’s had a sexual partner and Richard does make women feel safe.
Steven may be coming to spend some time with me in 2011 and I'm developing a closer connection with Tom. John won't see me any more and Jacob has lost interest in me because he is looking for a monogamous/exclusive relationship.
Just as with all aspects of life, things change. I see relationships ebbing and flowing.....people come and go from our lives. I recently ended a friendship with a woman I had known for 30 years. I had treated her like a sister, but she had gotten unpleasant and even rude to me within the last year. I sent her a letter explaining that I have no desire to talk to her or spend time with her any more.
Anyway......just sharing my misc. thoughts......any feedback is appreciated!!!
The key to life is in being fully engaged and peacefully detached simultaneously and authentically in each moment.