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Old 12-04-2010, 09:54 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Default How do you avoid distraction?

Hi all, so I am curious about something. How do people in a poly situation manage not to be distracted by the dynamics of one relationship when they are in the company of another? I mean, I had a long conversation with someone last night and I can't get it out of my head. I keep thinking about it and more stuff I want to say to him, and tomorrow I am going out to meet another friend for brunch, and I have a feeling it will be hard not to keep thinking about this.

I know it's all about being present to what is and living in the moment -- believe me I have lived for 15 years always trying to practice that -- but aren't there times when one person in your poly relationships seems to dominate your thoughts and gets in the way of relating to the other(s) with whom you are also involved? For me, relationships can be so heady and all-consuming sometimes. How do poly people handle this?
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"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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