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Old 12-02-2010, 06:56 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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You could try to test your comfort zone and keep pushing the envelope by voluntarily putting yourself in situations (with them or with other friends) where you leave by yourself and let yourself feel whatever comes up. The more you do it, the less daunting it will be. Maybe you'll realize it doesn't have to feel shitty, but that you can enjoy your alone time after being with people you love. Maybe not wanting to leave has something to do with fears of loneliness, or the sense that you need to hold on real tight to the good feelings you have when you're with them, and you haven't yet realized that those good feelings can still stay with you even if your circumstances shift and you are walking home by yourself.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 12-02-2010 at 08:08 PM.
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