View Single Post
Old 12-01-2010, 09:30 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

It seems to me that you need to be very clear about what you want. When people are able to yank us around, it's usually because we have some uncertainty or doubts about something. If you want it to be NSA with J., then say so directly. If you don't want anything or anyone taking away from your time with B., stand your ground. If you are wondering what the hell J. means when he says stuff, ask him. If you want your men to try and make an effort at civility toward each other, let them know. Be the one who is strong and certain. Things can change later, but figure out what you want and take a stance now. Think of other areas in your life where you have an easier time being a strong woman, and know that you can be that strong in this situation. As long as either of them see you as wishy-washy, you will continue to get yanked around and stressed out.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.

Last edited by nycindie; 12-01-2010 at 09:57 PM.
Reply With Quote