Welcome to my new blog. The old one with the nervous title just doesn't seem fitting anymore. These days peace, joy and love seem like a much more apt way to describe the way I'm feeling. I'm coming to the end of quite a turbulent year. This time last year I don't think that I could have comprehended how different I would be on the inside by now.
To the outside observer my life looks very much the same but internally I have really cemented who I am and what I want out of my life. I've come to the realization that everyone deserves to be happy. The more people are happy the more of that happiness comes back to us.
I've come to see my husband's girlfriend as a gift to our relationship. Before her I had the fear that I wasn't good enough and that he was just settling for me until something better came along that he really wanted. Although the 2 of them have more in common on the surface than he and I do we have a history and we understand each other. It's kind of nice that he has someone to talk to who is into some of the same things he is in a way that I'm not. I also know now without a doubt that he loves me for me and genuinely wants to be with me.
I'm really also enjoying being a part of RP's world. She's an amazing woman and her energy draws really good people to her. I know there are times when she doesn't know where she fits in the larger poly community but I see her as someone who is holding a part of the community together. She doesn't hesitate to reach out to those who are struggling. She notices when people are in need of that emotional support and doesn't hesitate to give it. There is a diversity in our community, as in any poly community, of how people practice poly. I think that we're all pretty essential to show all the different facets of what living this life can be.
I had this fear early on that openly having other partners would screw up the kids somehow. They just take it in stride. My daughter (who's 4) understands it as "some of our friends are more like family". To me that is a beautiful statement. We're doing something right here if that's the way she feels. My son (who's 6) really couldn't care a less about what his parents do as long as they're still paying attention to him! (although for the record I'm not allowed to shave my head like Mono because it would freak him out).
So much to look forward to. Life is good (which is rare for me to say in the middle of winter).
peace and joy and love to all