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Old 12-01-2010, 04:31 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by whatamIdoing View Post
Here's my concern... When talking to the other guy on the phone the other night (for two hours ) we talked about EVERYTHING, including how my husband is feeling about this... (he is scared for me and he is VERY Jealous)... and J said to me "I don't care how B (hubby) feels".... OUCH... I DO. B is my husband and I LOVE HIM.... I pointed out that I CARE how B feels and how B feels IMPACTS on me....therefore it might matter to J how B feels....
I was just talking to my girlfriend about this recently actually. For me it is very important to have the two sides at the very least, being cordial. A completely non-concern for the others feelings is a massive red flag for me.

Quote:
Do people manage to have relationships with two people who don't really want to have anything to do with the others? Sadly they know each other, they are friends or they WERE friends... I see that comfort slipping away from B and now from J too... both are on Guard. and I'm STRUGGLING
I know of one that is "managing". So it is possible. Its not how I could conduct a relationship, but some people can do it. If they want no contact then you need to, at the hinge, to conduct each relationship with 0 overlap and as separate individual relationships. Its more like 2 monogamous relationships instead of a working/functioning V.
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