K and I currently have a tacit understanding that I do not communicate with T without his go-ahead, since I sent the bday message without his prior knowledge...
So I can't ask T what he thinks as K doesn't want anything to do with him, and doesn't know if he EVER will...
This is simply not acceptable to me - if it was a definitive time, maybe...
I feel as though I am being not genuine... um.... not behaving with integrity as K has read my letter - which was written to BOTH of them, while T has not... I sent the letter to K first as I wanted to deal with his reaction and help him feel more secure, BEFORE I went ahead and sent it on to T... however I did not foresee K shutting down completely... I will not send the letter without his ok but at the same time I am not happy with not sending it... I need for both K and T to be aware of my core feelings... regardless of what the reaction or fallout is, regardless of where we all move towards from there - I NEED the integrity of having been honest to both of them.
Does that make sense?
Smile! It makes people wonder what you've been up to
Engaged to my sweetheart, WaterWolf