So, we're married! It was phenomenal, to say the least. A ceremony with much mention of being faithful, loving, respectful, caring and all sorts of other things you can and should be in any relationship. But no mention of one and only forever and ever.
Mr. A attended and had a good time, for the most part. There was a little awkwardness in explaining himself to friends and family who aren't in the know. But I made sure he sat with a good friend of mine and his GF who are in an open-in-the-right-circumstances relationship. They were extremely supportive and I am forever grateful.
A piece of advice to anyone who might find themselves in similar circumstances; have a back story for your relationship to the couple. Everyone at the wedding was explaining how they were related to us, but Mr. A could only say, "I'm a friend." Something we didn't think of.
The marriage caused a shift in my relationship with Indigo, or at least my awareness. It was a confirmation of the deep-running feelings and connection we share. This caused a bit of a surprise for me with Mr. A.
Over the past five months with Mr. A, our relationship has been changing steadily, naturally, while things with Indigo have been more static. At first, each time a change with Mr. A occured, or a new feeling developed, I would compare it to my relationship with Indigo. This was distressing, because I noticed some things with Mr. A that I didn't feel with Indigo. However, I knew I still loved Indigo, no matter what I felt for Mr. A, and eventually I relaxed and let both relationships be what they were and simply observed. With this change in my attitude came the realization that I didn't feel certain things for Indigo because I had already felt them. They were parts of a new relationship, not an established one.
Well, last night, I went over to see Mr. A and had a bit of panic when the reverse occured. I did not feel the same solid, soul-deep, connection I have now experienced with Indigo. Luckily, I was able to recognize that this was because these are two relationships in very different places and as unique as the people involved. And neither of these connections diminishes the other in any way. They both are what they are and should be enjoyed as such.
So for anyone out there reading, don't panic if you should experience the same. These loves of mine are very different in my heart. My mono-trained, logical brain wanted to rank them, but my heart has prevailed and simply loves.