As a new member myself it probably isn't my place to say "Welcome" but I can say "Hello".
Reading your post and what your friend said about 'Why can't you have both?" reminds me of a conversation my wife and I had a long time ago when we were discussing having an open marriage. I said to her then "Who decided that we can only love ONE person? Who made up this rule? And WHY? Who decided that I am only capable, or able, to love only one person instead of two, three or twenty? Where is the limitation on a human beings capacity to love other people?"
Nice to meet you and hope we get more chances to exchange ideas.