Originally Posted by ImaginaryIllusion
AFF is very much oriented to swingers and open relationship types, along with a few other things...the environment there is very sex based. There's also a lot of limitations on the site designed to make and keep people paying...so yeah...no one reads profiles since generally they can't see them. The poly's are probably there, but I think many loose interest after a while of dealing with the same issues you mention.
There's other free sites like PlentyofFish and OKCupid. POF is fairly mainstream, but there's probably a slightly higher Poly ratio there. The FSF section also has a fair number of couples seeking unicorns, so you may find some similar situations as AFF...but at least you don't need to pay for it.
Generally OKC seems better recommended, as the matching algorithms while fallible still tend to trickle like minded poly folk to the top of your matches.
Agreed to whomever suggested that dating resources should be made into a sticky thread.
yay! so it sounds like I've got lots of online dating ideas...now to move on to real life.
I wanna know how some face to face encounters have gone. What's worked for you guys and how do you approach someone and then later tell them to meet your girlfriend?
Ben works at a bar and a girl dropped him her number! He told me she was really cute, someone we'd both be really interested in and so he started flirting with her via text message and still thought she was really cool. finally she asks Ben, "are you seeing anybody?" and ben said something along the lines of,
"yes, but we have a very unique relationship."
"yes, she knows about you and she knows we've been texting."
"what's so unique then?"
"we're both looking for a girlfriend." and we didn't get a response back from her for a while. It was so nerve wracking. Until she finally explained that she had been super curious about sleeping with girls and that she was currently with a wide open lesbian who actually made her nervous. she said she was really interested in Ben and I because it would be an easy way for her to dabble into girls and still have the comfort of the same sex there. So finally we got the balls to ask her out for dinner, something casual so I could meet her and what not and she said that this week wouldn't work and that she'd call us when she might be more available. Haven't heard much from her since except she "accidently" sent ben a text... Now i'm just worried she's just in for my boyfriend... but she told him that she still interested in dinner for 3.