The first time round with s poly relationship can be a rough ride, that is why those of us who have been around the block have so many thoughts on what works; because the pain of it not working is hard and it all seems like its pointless to try. It isn't pointless and it does work, it just takes practice and considering what others tell/advice you about their personal journey; because they are wise due to experience.
No biggy, I would think that you learned something and can move on in time with more caution, more willingness to be patient, more adequate pacing for all and more control of emotions. Not to mention checking in with yourself and others more quickly, checking out what is NRE induced actions and feelings and what is realistic.
All a learning experience. Sorry you are hurting. Time will help I'm sure, be patient, you have no idea what is around the corner.
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