wifey, i am a gf of a couple.
honestly, i don't expect to be treated equally, now, don't get me wrong, i want respect, i get that & much love.
however, i know that the couple comes first. heck, they have 4 kids, 16 years of marriage...and i have what? 6 months of sex w/ them and a developing deeper friendship. no, marriage comes first. that's my opinion.
respectful towards her yes. but, i always ask my friend permission first.
for instance, i asked her if it would b e ok to send him pics and dirty texts. if she said no, fine.
but, it's what is comfortable in their marriage. your relationship with her should make your marriage stronger. u will have some obstacles i'm sure. i 'm also naviagating but i'm lucky to have 2 v laid back kind people.
lots of luck to you.