I think fair and equal is very important that has not been brought up to me before. I think it is unfair that I be expected to treat both our GF and my husband as equals when that is not the case. I do however agree that treating someone fairly when you cannot do equally should be totally acceptable.
The three of us have been together for about 3-4 months...yet I'm expected to treat her as an equal and they both feel that way. The pressure to do that is unbelievable on me.