I saw E today for a day of art spotting. I was pretty nervous about going but had a lovely day. I felt very comfortable around him and the few times he touched me (very respectfully) - putting his arm in mine, stroking his hand along my shoulders, gently kissing me goodbye - felt lovely. I've been having second thoughts about him lately (I think because my desire for A is so strong) but today has really pushed me off the fence. Where my feeling for A is like being hit by a train, my feelings for E are gentle and delicate - they can sit untouched, almost invisible, and then come back to life with the gentlest breath.
Mr FA has said he's ok for me to start being physical with A and E if I wish - not PIV but just gentle fooling around, taking it slowly. A knows about this and is still getting his head round it (he's not very happy at all ATM, work and housing situations are making him very stressed. I'm worried about him
) and up until now I hadn't mentioned it to E as I wasn't sure how I felt about him. After today I've decided to tell him, and just sent him an email. It's got some ground rules in it - take it very slowly, he needs to get tested, we're going to use as much protection as we can - so he has to be happy with those.