need more attention from bf
i see my male friend, i'm not even sure what to call him....once a week, sometimes 2x. his wife and i have been friends for several years. he and i have been making love for 6 months w/ the weekly arrangement that we have.
i care for him. his wife is comfortable sharing. he doesn't let her bcz he's not comfortable.
anyway, the reall issue, for me, is well, i feel like i need more attention...from him perhaps...i'm looking to date others...bcz i don't want to expect what he can't give me.
for example...i like to text or talk dirty...he doesn't feel very comfortable w/ it...i thought it made him uncomfortable, but he said he likes it. so it's usually me, sending sexy pics to him & suggestive texts. his wife is ok with this and tells me to have fun, go for it. so i have. but i'm left feeling...stupid..or even like a pest.
i am also left w/ my feelings being hurt...like i'm being used 4 just sex...but, i have a feeling this is not the case..it's just that he....well, his plate is full w/ work and kids...mine too...but i would like some more...signs that he cares. not alot...i've expressed that i'm used to getting more attention from my ex-husbands & men in general.
also got me to thinking about the stages of a relationship..honeymoon, intimacy. etc.
i feel that "twitterpatted" feeling (lol, learned that here) but i don't have enough time to enjoy it, and i keep it in check. i feel a little bit sad about this all.
thanks for reading. jodi