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Old 11-07-2010, 07:05 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,660
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How traumatizing and unnecessary your relationship dynamic seems to me. Why should he decide? That is what poly is all about, not deciding, but creating relationships that work for us and sustain themselves to the benefit of everyone involved... that is really fucking hard to do, btw but does work. An open mind, honest, respectful communication between all of you, respect, compassion and a google calender have created my poly foundation and we are a functioning happy tribe... if we aren't everyone involved knows that we expect and trust them to be honest about the need to look at the boundaries we have arranged with one another...

I suggest doing a whole lot of reading on here by doing a "search" or looking at the stickies available. There is a sticky on book recommendations that might be helpful.
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