So sorry for your pain. All of you.
It's torture, I know.
I wish I had advice, or resources, or something tangible to offer. I don't.
But I am praying for you all, for the best possible outcome for all of you, especially your kids. (I don't know if you believe in the power of prayer, and I certainly don't want to offer offense. But it's the most effective tool in my toolkit, and the only one that I can use to help y'all.)