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Old 11-03-2010, 10:54 AM
Seekinganswer Seekinganswer is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2010
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You are right GS
Quote:
Originally Posted by GroundedSpirit View Post

It's ok - hold on. Your first trial went pretty much as expected for most people. It's just one of the hurdles you get past - nothing more. Try not to read more into it than it deserves.
I started over analysing which made me seem even more tense and sad. I still catch myself doing it and stop myself before I derail onto the wrong path.

Quote:
Originally Posted by GroundedSpirit View Post
,

In an ideal world, all 3 of you would have had a discussion prior that went something like..............
"ok - this is going to be uncomfortable for ALL of us this first (and second or third) time. Lets understand right up front a lot of that discomfort is going to come from old programming and all COMMIT to calling that out and fighting through it. Let's try to only acknowledge any areas of discomfort that are coming from what we see - right now - in front of us. Not what's attached to the old paradigm.
Funnily, we had this talk afterwards and now this will help us figure out what we are comfortable with for now. Contrary to what I expected, S seemed more at peace after THE weekend. I thought he would get worked up and edgy that it didnt turn out as expected but he said he consciously decided to relax and go with the flow. This and that liberated feeling you mentioned is giving him that positive energy. D has also followed suit and seems more at ease. Before this, she was somewhat disturbed that everything seems to hang on my comfort. I am thankful that it is. I do wonder though, when you know that you are in the right place emotionally?
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