Originally Posted by Tonberry
In our case, Raga thinks it would be best if he had someone too when we announce it, because he's afraid... well, I guess he's afraid people will have a bad opinion of me otherwise... and perhaps of him for letting me
This really does hit the nail on the head of how I feel. I've made a mental list of coming out to people and prioritized it based on how I think they will react and if I want/need them to know....I'm a list maker by personality and profession....I've come out to the two closest people in my life (next to you my darling) and both reactions were good. One being a Research Chemist had a lot of straightforward, empirically based questions; the other more just talked about how much it meant to him to have me tell him (I've known him for 20 years and we've been like brothers since day one) but he knew what Poly was when I told him, I had to explain it to the Chemist. I am reticent to tell my family because I don't want them to jump to conclusions or judge TP or myself. I know I will come out to them but when I can accurately judge that I don't feel I need to justify myself and the life TP and I lead to them.
Originally Posted by TruckerPete
I think we won't ever get to come out to Indigo's parents until he has someone special, too.
I do feel weird at times, as though I'm some sort of slut for having TWO men. I worry what people might think of Indigo for "allowing" me to do this.
Perish the thought my love, you're only a slut in the best possible ways.
My concern is for how the reactions of people will make you
feel not how they see you. If you recall when you came out to your father, a lot of his questions seemed to make the assumption that I had pushed you into Poly not that it was a mutual, well discussed decision; I know how that made me feel, thinking your father thought I was this guy forcing something on his daughter (it was a dramatic reaction, I know) and I don't want you to feel that.
As long as we know where we stand, the path is always clear. And with you my love.