Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG
I don't trust in peoples ability to respect personal boundaries in these environments. I have no fear of people bothering me, I'm blunt and to the point. I worry about people pestering or taking leisure to grope, make offensive comments or otherwise solicit or harass those I care about. I've got a thing for the damsel in distress situation and seeing some one unwanted coming on to Redpepper or Derby would get a serious reaction from me. I know both can handle themselves and most guys wouldn't cross boundaries once warned off but it would be hard for me to not say anything.
I've never been to a sex party/swingers event (might do it, to check it out) and I don't know how or if the people are different.
But, what you describe above, doesn't sound that different from going to a club. It doesn't happen every time and it depends on the club, so, like Ari said, it's the people that could be the problem. Most of the time I can handle myself and most people back away when I'm not interested and quite often, someone does need rescuing.
My friend used to work as a bartender at a swingers event and she told me that there she observed some of the most honest, straightforward and respectful people who didn't play drama games and took no as a no.
I judge and I get first-impressions of people that can be entirely wrong. I acknowledge it and I try not to have it stand in a way of getting to know them. I even got a reminder tattooed on my arm for that, I'm a dork. :P