Hugs from me, as well!
Marriages can be a real stress factor. Ours wasn't stressful because of the money (we got the perfect wedding, exactly how we wanted it, for 500 bucks tops. But we hate the fancy stuff, so we just went to a restaurant and then bowling, playing pool and arcade games) but in our case everyone was calling us a few days before the wedding asking us to book hotels for them.
What the hell? Not only did we inform everyone 6 months early at the latest, but we're not booking agents! They were all adults and, on top of that, who knows what hotels are good in the place where they live
? I've never needed to stay at a hotel in Paris, they would have been better off asking friends!
Anyways, the stress was pretty bad right before the wedding, but it all vanished on the day itself, and it was a fantastic day. I'm sure yours will be equally enjoyable for you, TP
As for being a dirty little secret, I can certainly understand why you'd feel bad about it. I hate having to "hide" Sean to so many people, but Raga isn't ready to let his family or most of his friends and coworkers know about it yet... And well, since I'm an expat, that's the people I deal with. Every time I have to stop myself from mentioning him I feel a bit bad, because I would want to show him off to everyone!
In our case, Raga thinks it would be best if he had someone too when we announce it, because he's afraid... well, I guess he's afraid people will have a bad opinion of me otherwise... and perhaps of him for letting me.
Sean is going to spend the holidays with us, so I'm very curious how that's going to develop! Especially since Raga's parents are giving Sean and me a ride to the airport when he leaves... I can't imagine not being able to kiss him bye when I don't know how much longer it will be before I see him again!
...Not trying to hijack your blog here, TP, just saying I think I can relate to the way you feel to some extent. You've got all of my support!