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Old 11-01-2010, 06:44 PM
marksbabygirl marksbabygirl is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Squamish, BC
Posts: 790
Default Closing my blog

Don't know that I'll be around the forums.

I'm not wired poly. I tried. I kept trying - because he loves her and I didn't want to be the reason he ended it.

It was killing me - there are certain rooms in my house I just don't go into now - and I kept it from him - how much I was truely hurting.

I felt dead inside.

I love him enough not to ask him to end things because I don't want him to hurt. He hurts watching me hurt. And now I get to hurt because he's hurting. And its just a fucking shitstorm of pain all around. And I am hurting because I have caused hurt. I have caused pain.

I see how it can work - and how good it can be - but I am wired for emotional monogamy. I thought I could re-wire my brain... I just can't.

Thank you to all who I have connected with - if you have me on fb or email and wish to keep in touch - please do. Friends are so very important.
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